쉴드아이엘츠 11번째 샘플답안_학교가 싫은 아이들_최경훈 선생님_라이팅6.5샘플

안녕하세요, 아이엘츠에 열정이 넘치는 최경훈 선생님입니다.

오늘은 아이엘츠 라이팅 샘플로 학교가 싫은 아이들 문제를 작성해봤습니다.

전반적으로 자신의 답안과 무엇이 다른 지 비교해보세요!:)

 

<문제>

Many young people leave school with negative attitudes towards learning. Why? What can be done to encourage a positive attitude towards learning in young people?

 

<답안>

 

Many students usually consider their school an unavoidable place, possibly leading them to have negative attitudes towards learning. There are several causes of this problem, but there are also solutions. One cause is uninteresting subjects, and another is an academic-centered assessment system. Schools should focus on creating more various classes and activities.

 

Different students have different interests. However, schools usually have a few selected subjects such as mathematics, science, and language. Students hardly have a right to choose topics they learn. It makes students feel bored and indifferent to the classes. For instance, even though recently many are interested in social media, there is no way to learn about the topic deeply at school because it is not a regular subject.

 

Furthermore, schools usually assess students in terms of academic performance, but there are many other kinds of intelligence. Some students are the best at physical strength; others are skillful at handcraft. Unfortunately, those talents are not assessed and even disregarded as a hindrance to their learning. Many students who have those talents may feel it is unfair and think they are incapable.

 

A way to solve this problem is to design more subjects and activities students want. A quick survey can help find their interests. Schools can add some new topics related to those. For example, it is possible to teach them how social media marketing works in business. Students will be more engaged as they already use Instagram or Tiktok. Additionally, schools can create more extra-curriculum activities to enlighten students’ various talents. A variety of clubs for dancing, singing, and sports are good examples helping them engage more in learning.

 

In conclusion, many students lose interest in learning at school mainly because of unengaging subjects and only-academical assessment. Making various classes and club activities would help them learn something more engagingly.

 

(303 words)

 

<최경훈 선생님의 고득점 포인트>

  • Spelling 실수 주의
    • incapable(not uncapable(X))
    • hindrance(not hinderance(X))
    • mathematics(not mathmetics(X))
    • handcraft(not hand caft(X))
    • subjects(not sujects(X))
    • extra-curriculum(not extracurriculum(X)) *하이픈
    • extra-curricular 주의
  • 명사
    • hindrance to someone&something to명사에 대한 방해
    • lose interest 셀 수 없음

 

 

오늘은 여기까지 입니다.

지금까지 최경훈 선생님이었습니다!:)

감사합니다.

 

2021년 12월 26일

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